happy april
April 14, 2003 05:47 PM

There's a scene in Catch 22 (the book, I have no idea if it ended up in the film version) in which one of the characters is challenged to name one great American poet.

He's in the midst of multiple phone calls, and the end result is that someone, speaking to him on the phone, hears only "T.S. Eliot!" before he hangs up. I think an argument ensues over whether Eliot really counts as American or British.

T.S. Eliot's famous The Wasteland starts April is the cruellest month, breeding lilacs out of the dead land.

I do not believe in April Fool's Day. April fools who? I say, annoyed with the bastardized pagan holiday that we've turned into something desperate and silly.

These three things, taken together mean this: I celebrate April 1 as National Call Someone, Say T.S. Eliot, and Hang Up Day. Have done for many years. And some of you, whose email addresses I'm lucky enough to know, might have received the email equivalent of that traditional phone call two weeks ago. Some of you quickly figured out the sender, others probably ignored and deleted it.

But some of you might have wondered for a moment who sent that odd little email. Now you know. Happy April.